I keep sitting down to write and all that comes out is:
IT'S HOT. I'M HOT. BURNING. FLESH HURTS. LUNGS ARE TIRED. TOO HOT.
Perhaps part of the problem is that IT'S HOT. Wait, that's not where I was going with that. I'm not sleeping. Perhaps I will never sleep again. I'm starting to have some serious "Nightmare on Elm Street" type tension about bedtime.
It's not that I can't go to sleep. It's that I can't stay asleep. O's blood sugar fluctuates pretty wildly at night. We might head to bed with a decent blood sugar, then screw it up with a snack and spend the next five hours trying to decide whether or not we should correct. Or she might head to bed with a decent number only to bottom out at 2:00a. I never feel secure in just letting her go through even the better part of the night without checking.
Having Marc get up and do some of the checking is quite frankly not worth my time. He sleeps much more soundly than I do and doesn't wake to an alarm very well. If he is going to get up, nine times out of ten it is going to take me to wake him, and even if I don't have to wake him, I am still going to be awake. What's the point in both of us being up?
Last night O was 90 at 1:00am and would not eat or drink anything, not even a glucose tab, which is usually considered a big treat. I set the alarm for 45 minutes so that I could get up and check her again and give her a snack. The alarm didn't go off and I fell deeply asleep, not waking until 4:00. Of course, by then she had fallen to 51.
Apparently, I can get by on a smaller amount of sleep than I have ever needed or enjoyed in the past. But when I consider this going on and on and on (much like this HEAT we are having. HOT), I get a little antsy. I am afraid of what it is going to do to me over the long haul. Early-onset dementia at the worst and general fogginess and stupidity at best?
Labels: Chattanooga, diabetes, highs and lows, Marc, Olivia, sleep