OK, I'm not going to go so far as to say that our new sound machine from Target is a modern-day miracle, but in the five or six nights since we got it, O has slept straight through all but one of those nights. The rain setting seems to be the most soothing; I like rainforest also, but it's a little too chirpy.

I'm wishing that I could run over to Target today and pick up another miracle. It might take one to keep me from having to go back to work full-time. Marc's loans are starting to come due and by the first of the year, we will basically have what amounts to another house payment each month. I don't see how we can swing it without another full-time salary.

I feel like stomping my feet and having a fit. I do not want to go back to work full-time. It's not that I am afraid to work; it's that I already have the job that I want. I love staying home with O. This is where I want to be. I can hardly even bring myself to think about daycare, to think about what our days will be like when we are constantly rushing off to work, rushing home from daycare, hardly seeing each other. I can't stand it.

So, I am wracking my brains. I'm looking for a creative solution and asking everyone I know for ideas. I refuse to admit defeat yet. I'm praying for a miracle.