February 13, 2007

I am finding this book to be extremely helpful right now. (Thanks, Alish!) It's easier for me to process than some of the other things I have been reading because it is has an "OK, here's what you do" kind of tone.

Something I read last night caused me to lay it aside though. The author, whose two sons were diagnosed at 6 and 7, exactly one year apart, tells the story of how after five years of finger pricks and injections, she went to see a counselor because the finger pricks were so difficult for her. The counselor pointed out that the images that she had in her mind of her son's hands were of that of babies and that her sons were pre-teen boys. And just like that, she was able to let it go.

Olivia is a baby. And she still has baby hands. The finger pricks are hard. The little cotton balls with tiny blood spots on them are hard. I have to tell myself again and again that it is for her health, it is going to be a constant in our lives now and I need to adjust. I should really just follow her lead, because she is adjusting to that aspect beautifully. I so hate to hurt those tiny fingers, though.

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3 Comments:

Anonymous alish said...

ugh. that sounds hard. so sorry.
you have a good mental dialogue going(and are super strong). i'm glad she's adjusting so well. and that the book is helpful. her sons have written one, too, but it seemed geared to older kids. we are loving you and sending you much strength and hope and love and buttons.

8:39 PM  
Blogger Nicole P said...

I wish I knew what to say, but I don't.

If it helps you any to know, I give thanks for my parents - but most especially my mother - EVERYDAY because she had the strength to bear the weight of this disease when I was too young to know - or fathom - the depth of her hurting. I know that she tore herself apart those times when I outright refused to do my own testing or give my own shots - insisting that it was more pain than I could stand.

In hindsight, the shots and tests really never hurt all that much - but I think of my mother and how SHE must have ached - and I know I am one of the luckiest people on the planet.

9:55 AM  
Blogger Kerri. said...

I echo what Nicole said, almost entirely.

You guys, the parents, help us to be as strong as we can. And that makes all the difference in our lives with diabetes.

9:37 AM  

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